Jump Shot
by dfastback68
Summary: G1. There are a lot of reasons Seekers and Stunticons don't mix. This is only one of them.
1. Chapter 1

_Miles and miles of sun,  
Endless roads twist on _–Goldfrapp

* * *

These were the sort of scouting missions that danced the thin line between enjoyable and excruciatingly painful. Endless hours of flight time were like bliss to any Seeker, even if it was poisoned with the task of tracking a pack of ground pounders. Sometimes it took days to find them, other times they flushed them out in a matter of hours. Thundercracker was hoping for the former, since he and Skywarp had been itching to stretch their wings.

"_Anything_?" Thundercracker asked over the radio, not all that interested in the answer. The only thing he wanted to hear was 'no', so that they could keep flying.

"_Of course not,_" Skywarp replied. "_I don't really want to find them, anyways._"

They'd had enough dented nosecones, split turbines, and cracked wings to be excited about flushing out their targets. Still, putting forth the effort kept Megatron from scrapping their hides if they were stupid enough to complain about it. Their targets had gotten increasingly better at staying hidden when they didn't want to be found. That made for more flight time, but that also made them nastier once they were finally flushed out.

Thundercracker would prefer hunting Autobots. Those were cars he knew how to deal with, because all you had to do was shoot at them and drop them from dizzying heights. The Stunticons, on the other hand, were a nightmare to have to leash and drag back to base. When they got it in their thick processors to jump ship and hit the highways, there wasn't much use trying to convince them otherwise. Of course, if they stuck exclusively to the roads, the news reports of fifty-car-pileups would lead everyone, Autobots included, straight to them.

There were bunkers and warehouses, scattered all over North America, built by the Constructicons for Decepticon use. Thundercracker was convinced they started that project to get out of the base for awhile, but at least it was a project that sometimes came in handy. Except, of course, when Swindle used them for contraband storage or the Stunticons holed up in one during one of their jaunts. Thundercracker and Skywarp had checked three of them so far, finding no Stunticons, but reported some suspicious looking crates in one of them to Onslaught.

The fourth bunker looked like it had been used recently, the dirt path leading up to its doors carved with ruts from multiple vehicles. Thundercracker waited outside while Skywarp checked out the bunker itself. Every time they landed, he braced himself for an ambush, or some sort of trick on the Stunticon's part. He never felt right standing on the ground when he had to deal with them.

This was why fighting Autobots was preferable to fighting his own faction mates. Autobots rarely cheated, and when they did, Thundercracker could see it coming a mile away. Stunticons didn't know how to _not_ cheat. It was against their core programming and, he thought, irrefutable proof of Vector Sigma's wicked streak. It still astounded him that the same ancient gold orb that had cracked out the Stunticons would be responsible for something as blindly naïve and stupid as the Aerialbots.

"Well, no one's home," said Skywarp, clapping his hands together as he walked out of the small base. "Time to move on!"

Thundercracker grunted in response. As far as he was concerned, the only thing that kept Megatron from ordering the Stunticons terminated was Menasor. The combiner was too powerful an asset to let go, which the Stunticons took advantage of frequently. Thundercracker and Skywarp could hunt them down, incapacitate them and drag them back, but inflicting serious damage was out of the question. The Stunticons fought bitterly to maintain their freedom, though they were well aware of the consequences. Eventually Megatron would tire of their shenanigans and drag them back himself if he and Skywarp failed to trap them.

Until that happened, the ground pounders enjoyed making their lives a living Pit when they realized they were being hunted. It wasn't that they were disloyal; if someone so much as _joked_ about accusing Motormaster of treason, they were lucky to still be in one piece before the cycle was out. Thundercracker didn't pretend to understand their sudden vacations. May be, like he and Skywarp were made for the skies, the Stunticons were built for the roads, and felt at home on the twisting miles of concrete.

Of course, that reasoning was far too poetic, so it was dismissed from his processor in short order. Whatever their reasons, Thundercracker didn't care. Megatron wanted them back at the base, not joyriding like there wasn't a war going on.

Back in the air, the two of them continued their search, halfheartedly keeping an optic on the highways. _This_ was why Thundercracker didn't try to understand their little act of defiance: no monitor duty, no guard duty, no patrols – not even the constant threat of Megatron's ire. Just the vast, wide open sky. The extensive range of the Stunticon's territory along the coast of California and up into Oregon provided for hours of uninterrupted flight time. Neither he nor Skywarp were going to argue about that.

"_Oh, damn_," Skywarp said, straightening out of the barrel roll he'd been doing. "_I think we found them._"

The two jets dipped lower in the sky, coming up on the westbound expanse of the highway. There were only a few human motorists, and most of them were smart enough to pull off the road when they recognized what was coming at them.

"_One of them,_" said Thundercracker, watching a white Lamborghini as he flirted with speeds nearly triple the legal limit. "_And two Autobots._"

More Lamborghinis. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe, who had apparently tired of taking out jets and decided to stick to familiar territory. Considering their failure in the sky, it seemed they had taken to pounding on Stunticons. They were currently playing road tag with Breakdown, who was all alone and probably about to catch himself on fire.

"_How long before Breakdown swerves into a ditch?_" Skywarp snickered. Watching was a lot more interesting than intervening at this point. If the Autobots wrecked Breakdown, they might be able to use him to draw out the rest of the Stunticons. It was strange, however, to see a member of a gestalt alone.

"_I'm wondering where the other Stunticons are at,_" said Thundercracker, dropping back and checking his radar to search for more signals. Where there was one gestalt member, there were always others nearby.

"_Who cares?_" Skywarp snorted, flying lower as they got closer to the game of Lamborghini Tag. So far, it looked like the twins were winning. "_I want to see him get creamed._"

Thundercracker continued to hang back, scanners actively searching for the other Stunticons. It wasn't long before Motormaster lumbered into range, cruising at the uncharacteristic speed of the legal limit. He didn't appear to be in much of hurry; but since they were on the same road, he _had _to know Breakdown was in trouble. Not seeing any of the other Stunticons, Thundercracker assumed Motormaster was hauling them in his trailer, which would explain his speed. His distance from Breakdown was steady, suggesting they didn't have any intention of assisting him, either.

Deciding not to waste his time figuring Motormaster out, Thundercracker followed Skywarp closer to the action. The Autobots didn't seem to have noticed their approach, busy boxing Breakdown in between them.

"_Lamborghinis sure are high strung,_" Skywarp said, watching Breakdown slam on the brakes, while the advancing Autobots nearly collided with one another. Despite his maneuver, Breakdown still barely had control of himself, swerving wildly. He clipped a panicking station wagon, sending it spiraling across the road and into the ditch. The red Autobot slowed down for a brief moment, then sped up again when the human vehicle didn't blow up. "_I'm surprised Breakdown hasn't fallen apart yet._"

"_Me too,_" said Thundercracker. In fact, Breakdown had stopped swerving, bracing himself as the other two moved in once again. The Stunticon had a habit of shaking himself to pieces, which was what it looked like he was about to do. May be it would do him some good; wrecking himself might cause the other two to crash. It would be like - how did the humans put it? Like killing two birds with one stone. Only in this case, it was two Lamborghinis with one Lamborghini.

Skywarp flew down closer, wanting to get as close to the impeding explosion as he could. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe moved closer, and Thundercracker could hear Breakdown's engine screaming even over his own turbines. He was probably going to blow any astrosecond –

The realization that it was a trap hit Thundercracker like a swat from Omega Supreme, but not because it had been so obvious. The other Stunticons had hung back to let Breakdown do what he needed to do, knowing it could damage them as well.

"_Skywarp, what's Breakdown's weapon range?_" Thundercracker asked, feeling a sudden twinge of panic.

"_Weapon range?_" Skywarp sounded incredulous, doubtful that knowing that would have any relevance to what was going on. "_You mean – oh _slag _–_"

Skywarp vanished in a flash of light, just as Breakdown's engine _howled_. Sideswipe and Sunstreaker lost control immediately, sparks and smoke erupting from under the hoods. Rubber burned against the pavement, and Sideswipe went into a fishtail, tapping his brother unit with just enough force to send him careening across the highway. Breakdown hit the brakes to get out of the wreck he was causing, and a tire blew out in the process. He flew off the road, landing himself in a thicket of bushes and trees.

Thundercracker missed the entire spectacle, having found out firsthand what the range was on Breakdown's engine His turbines whined briefly before cutting out, and he coasted through the air in a one hundred and eighty mph free fall. His systems were happy to tell him how quickly the ground was approaching, but would do nothing in terms of restarting and getting him altitude again.

Thundercracker hit the trees first, reflexively transforming halfway down before slamming into the dirt. Landing in a tangle of his own limbs and tree trunks, the only thing he could of was how much he hated the Stunticons.


	2. Chapter 2

Breakdown was halfway out of the thicket when Motormaster pulled onto the shoulder of the road, air brakes hissing. His trailer door rolled up before he'd even come to a complete stop, and Drag Strip hopped out, followed by Wildrider and Dead End. Drag Strip had his blaster drawn on the two Autobots, though they were less than functional, having gone from one hundred and ninety miles per hour to zero quite abruptly. Black smoke poured out from under the hood of the red one.

"That was dismal," Dead End said as Breakdown pulled himself to his feet. He tugged Breakdown's arm to get him to turn around, giving him a once over. "But I suppose you'll continue functioning."

Metal whined and shrieked as Motormaster pulled the two Autobots apart from their wreck, prying the hood off of the red one. A lick of flame went up with the black smoke, and Motormaster waved his hand to try to clear the air.

"Useless," he said, turning to pull the hood off of the yellow Lamborghini. He gave the engine a hard look, then straightened up. "Alright, get workin'."

"Very well," Dead End said. Breakdown could almost hear the dispassionate sigh that should have gone with that, were it not for Motormaster. There was the sound of tires squealing, and Breakdown saw a human vehicle making a hasty U-turn in the opposite direction.

Dead End set to work cannibalizing parts from the engine of the crashed Autobot. If they were going to say to the Pit with the rest of the faction, they had to perform maintenance and repairs on themselves. It wasn't like they'd be gone forever – just long enough to have some fun at the expense of the Autobots.

"What do we do about the jets?" Drag Strip asked, blaster held loosely at his side. "You know they were looking for us."

"They ought to learn to look in the other direction," Motormaster grunted, gaze shifting to the trees. He was the one that decided when their jaunt ended, and Breakdown thought he might call this one in early on account of the damaged Seeker.

"Where'd they go?" Breakdown asked, optics darting up to the clouds. Had they been watching them the whole time?

"Thundercracker got nailed by your engine and crashed in the trees," Wildrider laughed, jerking his thumb in the direction of the forest. "Skywarp probably went to cry all over him or something."

"Yeah, but now they know where we are," said Drag Strip. "Even if we leave now, they'll be able to track us back to the bunker, or tell someone else."

The three of them turned to Motormaster, who was still looking off into the trees. Dead End let out a muffled explicative when something in Sunstreaker's engine shocked him, but he otherwise stayed out of the conversation.

"Drag Strip, Wildrider, go find where the jet crashed," Motormaster finally said. "Drag him back here by his wings if you have to."

The two of them transformed and sped off, Drag Strip swerving around trees, and Wildrider plowing right through them. The Seekers would hear them long before they saw them, but that didn't mean they'd lose the element of surprise. Especially since Wildrider was involved.

"Breakdown, keep an audio on the news frequencies," Motormaster said. "Unless these two didn't radio in to base, the Autobots know we're in their territory."

Breakdown nodded, tuning up his radio. A tire rolled by, and he looked over at where Dead End was working. All they needed, he thought, were some cinder blocks to put the Autobots up on. He repressed a snicker at thought, before a report caught his attention. Several motorists had reported the highway chase to the local police, who were probably in the midst of contacting the Autobots right now.

They would probably send a jet or use the Sky Spy, and the thought of the satellite looking down on them made Breakdown feel very exposed. He started when metal crunched on top of gravel, as Motormaster rolled the still-smoking Sideswipe into the ditch. Dead End had finished with Sunstreaker, and Motormaster lifted the Autobot by his bumper, dragging him over to his twin. He was rolled into the ditch as well, landing upside down on top of Sideswipe so that their roofs touched.

"Breakdown, get the tow cable out of my trailer," Motormaster said, folding down into his alt mode. "We're going to leave the Autobots a pretty little present to unwrap."

While not as comical looking as being jacked up on cinder blocks, Breakdown liked the idea of leaving the twins roped up. May be he could even tie a bow on top.


	3. Chapter 3

Thundercracker had no desire to move whatsoever. He felt like he had branches and sticks shoved in every joint he could count. He had landed on his back, which wouldn't have been so bad if he didn't have wings. At the moment, he wasn't certain he still _had_ wings. He was just going to lay here in agony for awhile –

Skywarp reappeared in a flash of light.

"Ouch," he said, wincing as he got a good look at his wingmate. "That looks painful."

"No thanks to you," Thundercracker spat. "Would it have killed you to grab me before teleporting?"

"It might have," Skywarp shrugged, earning a vicious glare from Thundercracker. "That was a pretty amazing crash, you know."

"I'm glad someone thinks so," Thundercracker said, hissing as he attempted to sit up. With any luck, his wings would come up with him.

"I wasn't talking about _you_," said Skywarp, grabbing Thundercracker's wrists to help haul him up to his feet. "I meant the Autobots. And Breakdown went flying into the bushes, too. Pity Reflector wasn't around to get a shot of that."

"I don't really care. I'm pretty sure I can't transform right now," Thundercracker grimaced, pulling a tree branch out of the nook between his back and left wing. He was incredibly relieved to find both wings still intact despite the less than stellar landing.

"Yeah, well –" Skywarp was interrupted by the sound of something fast approaching through the trees. It took them both a moment to realize that something was _literally_ going through the trees, which was never a good sign. Skywarp had the reflexes to duck as Drag Strip came sailing into the clearing, but Thundercracker was too slow to avoid his companion. The airborne Ferrari slammed into him at full speed, sending both of them crashing back into the trees. Thundercracker suddenly found himself in a head lock, as Wildrider had transformed in mid-flight.

He was in too much pain to struggle effectively, so he settled for clawing at the Stunticon, who had started laughing uproariously. Thundercracker caught a glimpse of Skywarp leaping into the air, leaving Drag Strip to make a grab for his legs, catching nothing but air and fumes. With Skywarp out of range, Drag Strip came to help Wildrider, grabbing Thundercracker's legs. He managed to kick him once, but after that he was lifted between the pair of them. Above the trees, he could see Skywarp following them, before he flew ahead towards the road.

Once out of the trees, Thundercracker saw that Skywarp had already landed, though he left a healthy distance between himself and Motormaster. They passed the smoldering frames of the two Autobots, whose roofs had been tied together so tightly that the metal had buckled under the cables. The rest of the cable trailed off into the woods, unseen. Wildrider and Drag Strip dropped him in the middle of the road, putting himself and Skywarp on opposite sides of the Stunticons.

"Megatron's been looking for you," Skywarp said, crossing his arms over his chest. They were already at a major disadvantage, so why waste time dancing around the reason they were even out here? Thundercracker had been hoping to use a damaged Breakdown against them, but that idea had completely backfired.

"You got those parts secure?" Motormaster asked Dead End, ignoring Skywarp. He was no good at intimidation, especially since he was trying it on someone like Motormaster.

"I said –" Skywarp stalled when he found himself staring at the tip of Motormater's sword. He found it immensely unfortunate that Motormaster had closed the distance between them with just his arm and sword.

"Save it, fly boy," Motormaster snarled. "I haven't heard a single word from Megatron himself, so you've got no weight to pull around here. We ain't got time for you sticking your nosecones in our business!"

"Just out of curiosity," Skywarp said, spreading his hands amicably. Only Thundercracker recognized it as a way to target two Stunticons at once. "What _do_ you have time for?"

"Time enough to get spare parts," Drag Strip said. "Then hitting the road before the other Autobots come running."

"Their response time isn't _that_ fast," Skywarp frowned. Unless they knew other Autobots were close by, which made Thundercracker question how crazy they _really_ were.

"Sure it is," Drag Strip said, transforming to his alt mode. "We're in Autobot territory. You couldn't call in Megatron to rat us out even if you wanted to, butterfly."

Thundercracker was liking this less and less. Drag Strip was right – he tried his radio, finding nearly all of the frequencies were blocked. He could still contact Skywarp and anyone standing right next to him, but that was about it. The Autobots had gotten better at jamming radios since Blaster turned up, and Soundwave had better things to do than constantly break his signals. That left them, as the humans said, up the creek with no paddle.

"I hear sirens," Thundercracker said, finally managing to sit upright. Skywarp turned to look at him, then down the road.

"Autobots," said Dead End, startling Skywarp. He hadn't heard him walk right up next to him. "Protectobots, actually."

"Swell," Drag Strip snorted, revving his engine. The smoke stack rising from the crashed Lamborghinis was an excellent beacon for them to follow. "Let's burn rubber!"

"Get him in the trailer," Motormaster said to Wildrider and Breakdown, swinging his sword around to point at Thundercracker. "We're not done with these two."

"Hey!" Skywarp stepped forward, but Motormaster was already transforming. Drag Strip drove up between them, cutting Skywarp off from the others. "Where do you think you're going!?"

Thundercracker had decided to stop struggling at this point, acting as a dead weight when the Stunticons picked him up. He felt a tug of dread when they approached Motormaster's dark trailer – didn't he have any _lights_ back there? He considered resisting, since his repair diagnostic had finally come back to him. The damage wasn't that bad, but it would leave him sore until he got some downtime.

A repetitive _thupthupthup_ filled the air, signaling the arrival of at least one Autobot.

"Make yourself useful and take care of that damn whirligig," Motormaster barked at Skywarp. Thundercracker was in the trailer now, which was tight fit with his wings. He could only guess that Blades had arrived; a human helicopter would probably be ignored by the Stunticons unless it got too close. He heard a jet take to the air, and then Wildrider pulled the trailer door down with a wave, sealing him into the dark.


	4. Chapter 4

Thundercracker braced his arms on either side of Motormaster's trailer, preparing for a bumpy ride. He had always thought ground transportation was a lot rougher than turbulence, so he tended to avoid it like cosmic rust. Once Motormaster started driving, his thoughts were proven correct. It was probably worse considering he had crashed through some trees and then gotten run over by a Stunticon, but every little bump jarred his frame. Everything hurt, and Motormaster lacked the decency to even give him some light.

The ride was miserable, but shorter than he had expected. Motormaster came to a grinding halt, and he could hear the others transforming outside. The trailer door rolled up on its own, and Thundercracker managed to shimmy out before he had to suffer the Stunticons 'assisting' him. Skywarp came down from the sky and landed next to him, giving the area an appraising look. It wasn't much different from the last bunker they'd been at.

"Well, this place looks like a dump," Skywarp announced. Motormaster paid them no heed, pulling off to the side to transform.

"Well at least it's not underwater!" Wildrider shouted. "Anything's an improvement over _that_ dump!"

Skywarp said nothing in response, hating the fact that he actually agreed with the spastic Stunticon. Actually, come to think of it, did _anyone_ like the underwater base?

"A dump's a dump," Motormaster said, optics raking over the bunker before settling on Skywarp. "Where's the Protectobot?"

"Ate some heat-seeking missiles," Skywarp said. The way he crossed his arms over his chest thankfully concealed the way he puffed up at that declaration. Even if he radioed him, Thundercracker doubted he could get through to Skywarp about how _not_ in control they were right now.

"Fine," Motormaster turned on his heel and marched off towards the bunker. This one went underground, the concrete dipping down at a sharp angle just past the doors. Skywarp looked a bit miffed, but shot Thundercracker a questioning look: didn't Motormaster even want to threaten to rip their wings off?

In fact, none of the Stunticons were even looking at them now. Dead End was giving Breakdown a thorough look over, picking twigs out of his wheel wells when he spotted them. All of Breakdown's tires had gone flat from the drive to the bunker, but he would have new ones in no time, courtesy of the Autobots.

"This is fun, isn't it?" Skywarp asked cheerfully. Thundercracker gave him a look that would give Omega Supreme pause, but Skywarp only smiled. They'd been in worse spots, right? He didn't think it could get much worse than this, actually.

That was when Skywarp had the wind knocked out of him, something round smashing into his cockpit with enough force to bowl him over. He landed on his aft, clutching his cracked cockpit with one hand. Biting back a curse, he watched the object that had hit him bounce away.

"You were supposed to catch that," said Drag Strip, smirking as he bent to pick up the orange ball. Skywarp shot him a glare as he bounced the ball up and down on the pavement. It occurred to Thundercracker that a lot of concrete had been poured at this particular base. Mixmaster must have been having an absolute riot that day.

It would also explain why the Stunticons seemed more at home here than the main base. Home was where the fuel pump was, and the Stunticons pledged their undying, twisted love to the roads of concrete and asphalt.

Drag Strip passed the ball to Wildrider, who, much to Thundercracker's surprise, caught it and darted off with it. Seeing any kind of coordination from him was a shock in and of itself, but it turned into amazement when he launched himself into the air, shoving the ball through a wire hoop attached to a stripped tree.

"Huh," said Thundercracker, as Wildrider ran to catch the ball again.

Skywarp gave him a wildly confused look, probably wondering if the Stunticons _ever_ fired on all cylinders. Making the mistake of looking away from Wildrider nearly cost him, but Thundercracker reached out and snagged the ball before it collided with Skywarp's face. He looked at it a moment, then across the concrete lot towards the hoop.

Ignoring the expectant looks the Stunticons were giving him, he shifted his weight, lifted the ball, and gave it a toss. The orange ball sailed across the lot, where Wildrider leaped up to knock it off course. He missed, and the ball went straight through the hoop.

"Get _out_," Skywarp looked askance at Thundercracker, who only shrugged. He resisted rotating his shoulder, since the throw had kinked some wires. He shouldn't be doing anything besides recharging, but that wasn't going to happen any time soon.

"It's a human game," he said. It wasn't surprising that the Stunticons had taken to it; they were practically native to the planet as it was.

"Up for a round?" Drag Strip asked, dribbling the ball up and down. Thundercracker hesitated. What he needed now was repairs, not human sports. Besides, Drag Strip had a competitive streak that drove even the stoic Soundwave up the wall. And Wildrider? He'd already been run over once, thanks.

"What's the winner get?" Skywarp asked, before Thundercracker could refuse anything. It was his turn to give Skywarp a panicked look. "Besides gloating rights?"

Wildrider let out a compulsive laugh, which Drag Strip ignored.

"High grade," he said. "Two cubes."

"You're nuts," Skywarp snorted, much to Thundercracker's relief. Besides, he doubted these road rats had high grade, and two cubes wasn't even that much. If they _did_ have high grade, as well as a collection of spare parts, then they could live apart from the rest of the faction for much longer than he'd thought. "No way is _that_ worth it for us."

"Fine," Drag Strip said, optic band darkening. "You win, you get two cubes of high grade _and_ we go back to base with you. We win, which I – _we_ will, we get two cubes of high grade and you go back to Megatron empty handed."

"Still nuts," said Skywarp. "You've got to go back eventually, anyways!"

Thundercracker didn't like the smirk on Drag Strip's face – it just confirmed what he'd thought about how self sufficient they'd suddenly become.

"Skywarp, you don't even know how to play," Thundercracker said, desperate to head them off before they agreed on something.

"Well, I'm feeling charitable today," Drag Strip said, tossing the ball back over to Thundercracker. He caught it without thinking, and felt that somehow he'd just sealed their fate. "Teach yourselves. We've got work to do anyways."

"We do?" Wildrider looked confused, but Drag Strip was already in vehicle mode and speeding off. He quickly followed suit, not wanting to be left behind. Thundercracker realized it was just the two of them now; Dead End and Breakdown had gone inside at some point.

"High grade," Skywarp said. That was tempting. "You know how to play?"

"Sort of," Thundercracker said, bouncing the ball between his hands like Drag Strip had done. "It's not that complicated."

"Give me that," said Skywarp, snatching the ball out of mid air. He spun the ball around between his hands, probably wondering the same thing Thundercracker was: where on Earth had they gotten a basketball this big? As much as he'd like to know, it was better that the Stunticons remain a mystery to him. The day he understood them would be a dark day indeed.

Sizing up the hoop, Skywarp chucked the ball in its direction. He missed by a considerable distance, and the ball crashed into the bushes behind the tree.

"So that's why your missiles are heat seeking," Thundercracker smirked, crossing his arms over his chest. Skywarp made an irritated noise, before teleporting into the trees and fishing out the lost basketball. He tossed it back at Thundercracker, who caught it with ease.

He started dribbling the ball again, getting the feel for it. Skywarp watched him somewhat jealously – how was he so good at that?

"We'll start like this," said Thundercracker, moving closer to his wingmate as he dribbled the ball. "If you're moving, you've got to bounce it – dribble it. Otherwise you get a penalty."

"Yeah? So who's keeping track?" Skywarp frowned. That gave Thundercracker pause – if there wasn't a third party, the game would get really ugly, really fast. The only one he _might_ trust would be Dead End, but he might not even pay attention to the game long enough to referee.

"We should just leave," Thundercracker said, looking towards the bunker. "How are they going to stop us?"

"I thought you said you couldn't transform," Skywarp said. He hadn't been too keen on the idea of teleporting while damaged, even if they'd done it before.

"It's not as bad as I thought," said Thundercracker. "Just sore."

"Alright. Okay, so, say we leave. Then what? I don't want to have to call in _backup_ to deal with these dirt suckers if we can't do this ourselves! Besides that, we're right in the middle of Autobot territory!" There was no going back, was what Skywarp was trying to say. Unfortunately, Thundercracker had to agree. How else were they going to get the Stunticons to come willingly if they didn't play by their fragged up rules?

"It's a bad idea," Thundercracker said, shaking his head. "But we'll play. Now pay attention, because your aim stinks."


	5. Chapter 5

"We get two free points to start."

"For _what_?"

Thundercracker held back a sigh, wishing there was a way to stop Skywarp's mouth before it started. Putting them two points ahead would make Drag Strip even more crazed about winning, and that was something he didn't want to see.

"Thundercracker's damaged," Skywarp shrugged. "You know, sympathy points. It's Breakdown's fault anyways, so -"

"Al_right_," Drag Strip huffed dramatically. "But we get to start with the ball."

"What? It doesn't work like that," Thundercracker said, and Drag Strip's face told him he hadn't been expecting him to know any of the procedures of the game. "Have Breakdown toss it in."

Even if he chucked it towards the other Stunticons and not down the middle, at least he'd throw it. Dead End already looked so uninterested, he might as well be on another planet.

"Fine," Drag Strip growled, making Thundercracker even more uneasy. Ticking him off was going to make him intolerable to play against. "Let's lay down some rules. First, no weapons."

"No force fields," Skywarp shot back.

"No teleporting," Drag Strip didn't hesitate.

"No alt modes."

"No _flying_."

"No internal comms."

"No -"

"Why don't we just stand around and stare at each other if you're going to have that many rules!" Wildrider burst out. Drag Strip and Skywarp looked at him, then each other. Skywarp shrugged.

"Eh, good enough," he said.

"We can boil it down to 'no interference'," Thundercracker said. He meant Breakdown and Dead End, but his gaze wandered over to the bunker.

"Motormaster's busy," Drag Strip said, noticing where Thundercracker was looking. "He doesn't want anything to do with this, anyway."

"Hey, remember when you threw the ball and it bounced into the bunker and whacked him in the head?" Wildrider's face split into a grin.

Drag Strip's frown was deeper than the Grand Canyon, and Thundercracker thought for a moment that the ball was going to pop in his hands.

"Yeah, that was funny," Wildrider said. His smile faded after a moment, and he said: "Actually, no, it wasn't. It was pretty awful."

"You sure you don't wanna forfeit _now_?" Skywarp asked, jerking his thumb at Wildrider. Seriously, he thought he was going to win with _that_ on his team? No wonder Prime always flattened them in battle.

"Breakdown, right up the middle," Drag Strip said, ignoring Skywarp and tossing the ball towards his teammate. Breakdown caught it and stood up, waiting for both teams to line up and face one another. When he hesitated, everyone looked down at the ball in his hands, instead of at him.

Thundercracker gave him credit for throwing the ball exactly down the middle, and not at his teammates, but it hardly mattered. Drag Strip had the ball so fast that even Wildrider got left behind,. It went through the hoop before Thundercracker was even halfway there.

"Tied!" Drag Strip laughed, bouncing the ball after catching it.

_Not the best start_, Thundercracker thought. Skywarp looked furious, but also determined. If he hadn't been taking this seriously before, he was now.

The ball was passed back to Breakdown, and the process was repeated. Drag Strip nabbed the ball again, but this time Skywarp was on him, blocking his path with his height and wingspan. This did nothing to stop Drag Strip from throwing ball _over_ him, where Wildrider caught it and earned them another score.

"Four-two," Breakdown announced, catching the ball as it bounced his way. Thundercracker felt completely useless – he could see what was happening, but wasn't nearly fast enough to do anything about it. They were going to get creamed if something didn't give.

Drag Strip caught the ball a third time, and while Skywarp moved to block him, Thundercracker managed to intercept Wildrider. As soon as he had the ball he spun to the side, away from Wildrider, and threw it from where he stood. With no one to knock it off course, it hit the wire hoop, and then bounced in.

"Four-four," Breakdown said.

"Ha!" Skywarp said. "Nice one, Thundercracker!"

"Lucky shot," Drag Strip muttered, jogging past them to scoop up the ball.

By some miracle, Thundercracker caught the ball when Breakdown threw it, and he darted towards the hoop, Skywarp covering him. Wildrider cut Skywarp off, which allowed Drag Strip to barge in. There was a sharp sting of electricity when the Stunticon got too close, the shock landing Thundercracker on his aft as Drag Strip ran off with the ball.

"Six-four."

Skywarp went to haul Thundercracker up, but he waved him off. He was starting to get dizzy, though it wasn't from the shock of the force field. The scowl on Skywarp's face indicated he knew exactly what had happened, but he didn't say anything about it.

Once the dizziness wore off, he heaved himself to his feet, and they lined up against the Stunticons once again. It occurred to him that they hadn't set a time limit, which meant he was probably going to pass out before the game ended. This was the last time he ever agreed to do anything with any Stunticon, unless it involved shooting at Autobots.

Skywarp snatched the ball this time, narrowly avoiding Wildrider as he ran for the hoop. Drag Strip lunged for the ball, intending on stealing, but there was a flash and Skywarp vanished with it. He reappeared above the hoop, slamming it down hard enough to shake the tree.

"_No teleporting!_" Drag Strip bellowed as soon as Skywarp was back on the ground.

"And no _force fields_!" Skywarp shouted back, pointing an accusing finger at the Stunticon. "Fair's fair!"

"The force fields are instinctive!"

"Well, so's the teleporting!"

Thundercracker covered his face with one hand. _This_ was why it was a bad idea; not only would the game be entirely unbalanced, but he knew the arguing was going to get out of control eventually. Skywarp and Drag Strip were inches away from one another, shouting so loudly he saw Breakdown shoot a nervous look towards the bunker.

Wildrider was looking back and forth between them with poorly concealed amusement, which fell into a frown after a moment.

"Do you hear that?"

"Hear _what_?" Skywarp snapped, rounding on Wildrider.

"It sounds like -" Wildrider stopped, looking up at the same time Drag Strip looked down. Having looked in the correct direction, Wildrider was the first one to see what was coming, and dove out of the way before it hit. Concrete buckled and shattered under the impact of something _big_, knocking Drag Strip and Skywarp off their feet. Skywarp crashed into Thundercracker, sending them toppling to the ground.

The pain caused Thundercracker to black out for a moment, and he came back online wondering whose great idea it had been to drop a bomb on them. Had the Autobots snuck up on them?

"Hey, get off -" Wildrider's voice cut off when he went sailing through the air, and Thundercracker heard him crash into the other Stunticons. Managing to push himself upright, Thundercracker got a good look at what had hit them.

It hadn't been the Autobots; it had been Astrotrain, falling on them like an atomic bomb with an bad attitude.

Drag Strip had his blaster halfway up when he found Astrotrain's rifle aimed right at his face. Considering the rifle was about as long as he was tall, he wisely dropped the blaster, keeping his hands up.

"Megatron wants you – _all_ of you – back at base within the hour," Astrotrain said, trigger finger twitching when Wildrider noisily untangled himself from Breakdown. Dead End had been near catatonic during the game, but he was at full attention now.

"Oh, shove off!" Wildrider yelled. "If he wants us back so bad, he'd tell us himself!"

"Yeah?" Astrotrain snarled. "You think I'm out here for my health, then? You think I want to spend my downtime flying around Autobot territory looking for some wayward Stunticons and Seekers?"

"I think you've got something lodged in your slide valve," Drag Strip muttered, flinching when the rifle jerked in Astrotrain's hands.

"And _I_ think you've got less than an hour to get back, otherwise Megatron'll sell your sorry hides to the scrap yard," Astrotrain said. Thundercracker felt himself tense up, realizing that with the shock starting to wear off, the Stunticons were likely going to gang up on Astrotrain. It didn't help that Astrotrain sent a sidelong look at the bunker, well aware that Motormaster was lurking nearby. Even if he could mop the floor with the Stunticons, there was no way he was stupid enough to take on their leader by himself.

The tension broke when a jet roared overhead, and Thundercracker caught a glimpse of Blitzwing banking around to circle them. Just like gestalts, where there was one triple changer, the other wasn't far away. None of the Stunticons seemed interested in taking on both of them.

"We'll be back in a half hour," Drag Strip announced, and Astrotrain lowered his rifle. He shot Thundercracker and Skywarp a nasty look, and then took to the air, the heat of his engines causing Drag Strip to stumble back.

"You can fly, right?" Skywarp hissed in Thundercracker's audio. When he nodded, Skywarp hauled them both up to their feet. "Then let's go going."

The game was a total bust, and they were going to get it for failing to bring the Stunticons back themselves. If Astrotrain really had been pulled from his downtime, they were going to have to deal with his ire as well. As they took off, Thundercracker understood why Skywarp was in such a hurry to leave. Motormaster had appeared, standing in the threshold of the bunker and looking damn near homicidal.

The Stunticons probably weren't having another joyride for a long, long time.

* * *

_Slide valve: a valve for controlling steam admission and exhaust shaped like a rectangular lid [in locomotives]._

_I also have the image of Motormaster sitting in the quiet bunker, going over reports, when a basketball glances off of his head out of nowhere. He calmly stands up, walks out of sight, and then the screams of terror begin._


	6. Chapter 6

_One week later_

Skywarp hadn't seen any trace of the Stunticons since they'd ditched them at the bunker. He knew they were back in the main base, but they had made themselves scarce for once. Normally he'd check around corners first, just in case an impromptu race had started in the corridor. With the exception of the Insecticons flooding one of the lower levels by eating away at the superstructure, the base had been relatively quiet.

Megatron had been mildly irritated at the very least, leaving the punishment of the Seekers to Starscream's discretion. They all knew the worst he would do to them was ground them, which both Thundercracker and Skywarp were fine with, all told. During the half-hearted scolding, Starscream had informed them of how the Stunticons had fared, which wasn't nearly as bad as Skywarp had wanted.

The 'present' they had left the Autobots hadn't been the twins tied together – it had been what was on the other end of the tow cable. Whoever tugged it to see where it led set off the incendiary device buried under a pile of dry sticks and kindling. Within six hours, the Governor of California had declared a state of emergency, and the headlines announced it to be the worst arson-related brush fire in decades.

Loathe as he was to admit it, Skywarp gave the Stunticons credit for knowing how to set things on fire. Even with the Protectobots right there, the forest had gone up so quickly that they could only begin evacuations, and nothing else. Megatron had been pretty pleased with that, and waved off the joyride stunt without so much as a cross word towards Motormaster.

Skywarp and Thundercracker hadn't been the only ones upset to hear that; Astrotrain was still holding a grudge against all of them, though it seemed Blitzwing couldn't be bothered to care. Thundercracker had checked the duty roster, finding that they actually had been off the patrol list that day. Since Astrotrain had a justified reason to be irritable with them, they decided to avoid him at all costs. The problem with being on a ship sitting on the ocean floor was that there were a finite numbers of passages and detours to use; they'd run into each other eventually.

It was a Stunticon, however, that Skywarp ran into first, just outside the medbay. He had been hoping to just walk right by him, but the yellow gravel grinder somehow managed to block his path.

"So," Drag Strip said in a tone that was in no way conversational. "You owe us some high grade."

"Excuse me?" The game had ended when Astrotrain crashed the party, with no winners and no spoils to be exchanged. Skywarp did not look forward to what was going to come next.

"We won," Drag Strip continued. "Six-four."

"It was tied," Skywarp said. "No one won, end of story."

"It would be tied if you hadn't teleported to get that last one," Drag Strip shot back. "Since that was against the rules, it doesn't count. We won, six-four."

"Have you been huffing your own fumes?" Skywarp couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You used your force field, so that doesn't count either! Which puts us at four-four: a _tie_!"

If Drag Strip kept trying to knock off points, Skywarp was going to knock a few pistons loose. Thundercracker was right; it _had_ been a bad idea.

"Well then those sympathy points don't count!" Drag Strip clenched his fists. "Thundercracker did fine!"

"Oh, so all you're going to leave us with is the score he made?" Skywarp snarled, about ready to teleport the dirt sucker into the nearest volcano. "You're pathetic!"

"And you-"

"Mind if I play tie-breaker again?"

Skywarp and Drag Strip started, whirling around at the same time to find that Astrotrain had come up behind them. A quick look past his wingspan told them that Blitzwing wasn't around, but that didn't mean much when one was already cornered by a triple changer.

"Yes," said Drag Strip. "Now go away."

"I understand you were playing for high grade," Astrotrain said, undeterred. Neither of them answered, but the silence was so uncomfortable that it was all he needed to hear. "I've got an idea to solve this little dilemma of yours. How about the both of you pay _me_ two cubes each, since I had to give up my downtime to settle your score?"

Drag Strip bristled at that. "How about you stick it in your spokes, you smoke blowing -"

"Finish that and I'll make it two cubes per Seeker _and_ per Stunticon," Astrotrain said darkly, and Drag Strip's mouth snapped shut. "One more time: you pay me, and consider your score officially settled. Got it?"

"Yeah, fine," Skywarp said quickly, before Drag Strip made things worse than they already were. He ignored the nasty look he got, hoping Astrotrain would take the bait and leave them alone. "We'll have it to you by the end of the cycle."

Astrotrain hesitated; he obviously hadn't been expecting them to cave in that quickly. "There," he finally said. "That easy, wasn't it?"

Skywarp shrugged, but that was good enough for Astrotrain. Both of them waited until Astrotrain's tailfin disappeared around the corner before saying anything.

"You got any more of that tow cable?" Skywarp asked.

"We've always got tow cable," Drag Strip said, in a way that Skywarp decided he didn't like at all. He'd save that tidbit for later, though.

"Good," he said. "Because I know exactly what we're going to do with those cubes of high grade."

There was a moment, a very brief moment that Skywarp would never admit to, of camaraderie and understanding between them. It ended the moment Drag Strip opened his mouth.

"So," Drag Strip said. "We still wo-"

"Oh, _frag off_!"


End file.
